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Tasty Company Voluntary Arrangement

I was wondering a while ago what a Brontosaurus would taste like which led to me trying to work out how long it would take to roast one.

So I had a look at Wikipedia to see how much they weighed. My first problem was that a Brontosaurus is now called an Apatosaurus, why on earth this is I have no clue, so I will continue to refer to it as a Brontosaurus.

Well an average Brontosaurus weighs 16 Tonnes which in English is around 35,000 pounds. Assuming that a lot of the weight is skin, guts, head and various other bits we will not cook, I figured a ‘dressed for the oven’ Brontosaurus will weigh around 20,000 pounds. Feel free to argue this point, I am guessing and have no previous butchery experience to guide me.

Cooked using Beef as a guide, the Brontosaurus needs 14 minutes per pound for it to roast to ‘medium’.

So I reckon it needs around 4666 hours in the oven, so if you want on for next Christmas dinner you need to pop it in the oven in May……….ish.

Apparently they taste of Chicken.

As a Director reading this you may have time on your hands to research this nonsense, I hope you have, for the right reasons.

If you feel that your time is more precious as you are being pursued left, right and centre by HMRC enforcement officers for non payment of VAT, PAYE or Corporation Tax then Taxgone recommends turkey for your Christmas dinner and a Company Voluntary Arrangement for the business, don’t become a Dinosaur and get eaten by the big guys!

 

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